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“Look at my fucking pink trousers” may not have the same ring to it, but works better for TOMMY SHANE and GRACE FARMILOE.
What a Duck-up!
Cam Conservators have been accused of attacking sitting ducks.
News From The Dark Blues
Penises, both broken, intact and up-close, seem the order of the week from Oxford. ISAAC DELESTRE reports.
Bonkers Bone To Block Bumps
2000 anarchists are due to descend on the May Bumps next month in protest of Mr ASBO’s move.
Cambridge Student Arrested in Exam Scam Sham
A student at Darwin is in the slammer for helping immigrants cheat their way into the county.
News From The Dark Blues
ISAAC DELESTRE once again treads the fine line between slander between slander and circumspection to bring you news of the other place.
Chinese Whispers: 100 Grand to Get You Into Oxbridge
Can’t get into Oxbridge? Here’s a way to win your entry. One thing: it costs 100K.
No Victories For Student Council Hopefuls
Students lose out in council elections amidst a low turnout.
UPDATE: Two Charged Over Fitz Robbery
Officers detain two men in relation to the Fitz robbery in London after Crimewatch appeal.
UPDATE: Fitz CCTV Released
UPDATE: The Museum’s silent alarm system was not linked to the police.
Bomb Scare Mare: Universities in Bomb Hoaxes
Unis across the country have been hit by bomb scare hoaxes.
Editor’s Pick
The Dark Side of Eurovision
TOM BELGER investigates the side of Azerbaijan that it doesn't want the rest of Europe to see.
