It’s the penultimate installment and Rates/Slates is feeling peaky.

Tab Rates vs. Tab Slates introduces you to ‘danger milk’ and invents a new universal truism.

Rates vs. Slates rejoices over hats and renewed academic confidence (ish) but slates coach drivers and being introduced as ‘friendly’.

Tab Rates vs. Tab Slates apologises for its lateness this week, but it’s been in a dire essay crisis and the maintenance man’s pigeon carcass didn’t help matters.

John’s ‘fresher’ and internet sensation Mark Liu returns with his third video, demanding an apology from The Tab, and asking our Features Editor on a date.

The Tab’s fortnightly feature reveals the best-read, most small-minded, offensive or eccentric comments to appear on the site. Read here, and see if your name (or ridiculous pseudonym) appears.

“Climate of anger and mistrust prevails” as Catz Dean closes their bar “indefinitely” and cancels Halloween bop.

Rates are thinner on the ground as Rates vs. Slates moves into Week Four and reflects on the previous seven days.

Rates vs. Slates has had a lot of cycle-related amusement/distress this week, as well as feigning madness to escape college jurisdiction.

Every day, The Tab’s loyal readers invest the site with their own choice words, some more choice than others. Read our pick of the site’s best comments here.